


Do it the Strider's Way

by Lacertae



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AT - Freeform, Alpha Timeline, M/M, Mechanic(s), Mechaphilia, Other, Vibrator, Voyeurism, explicit sex scene, this is a porn scene between Brobot and Dave, voyeur!Dirk, yes - Freeform, you read it right
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-09
Updated: 2012-04-09
Packaged: 2017-11-03 08:36:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/379428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lacertae/pseuds/Lacertae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brobot and Dave spend some quality time together after Dave loses a bet.</p>
<p>From the Kink Meme</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do it the Strider's Way

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, this was written for the kink meme, and it features robot sex, irony and Brobot being Brobot (a tease). I hope you like!

“I’m… not sure this is legal,” Dave grunted out, feeling cold, metallic fingers slip past his godtier shirt to touch the skin of his stomach. “Nor ironic”.

The robot -or android, or whatever the fuck it was- did not reply, glowing red eyes fixed on his face.

Dave felt uneasiness creep inside of him, but refused to give into the urge to squirm.

This wasn’t exactly like fooling around with a real person, because he couldn’t really read into the bot's expression to gauge what he was thinking; even with Bro -or Dirk- things were easier, if only because he knew where to look.

Unfortunately, there was no crack in this robot’s facade, and it sent shivers down his back.

“Actually,” Dave continued, licking his lips, “I think this is not really something I should be doing, and maybe-”

The android whirred softly as the optical lens placed on its head sifted and refocused a bit; the eyes were glowing red, empty and unfeeling.

“I won,” the bot’s voice was weird -it had inflections and tones, just like a human’s, but with a distinct metalling undertone that made it clear it didn’t belong to a living being. “There was a vocal accord between the two parties -myself and you, Dave Strider- and while not mandatory, you are strictly recommended to respect your side of the contract”.

Dave grunted softly as the metallic joint caressed his belly in circular motions; the movement was absurdly soothing, almost as if the bot knew exactly what to touch to make his body relax.

It was even creepier.

“You seem awfully interested in doing this,” he replied, keeping completely still as those hands wandered to his side, pressing down and making him breathe out in contentment as they relaxed tense muscles he didn't know he had.

“I might be a robot, but I was programmed with care by my master, and he used a captchalogued imprint of his own brain as of two months ago to update my circuits,” BroBot stated, condescending tone and emotionless face. “While my built is very much metal and circuits, every mental stimulus I feel roots from that. I feel, think and reason just like the original Dirk, and I take pleasure in doing things I enjoy”.

There was a pause in which BroBot pushed Dave against the grass, leaning down until they were staring at each other, burning orbs reflecting in Dave's shades.

“And I am going to enjoy doing you,” the bot added. While his face betrayed no emotion, his voice had a lewd, smug tinge that sent Dave’s cheeks aflame.

He looked away, feeling very much cheated. “That was a totally corny thing to say. The worst pickup line ever created. So bad I should have left as soon as you finished talking”.

BroBot chuckled.

“But you are still there, aren’t you,” he even dared sounding amused. Stupid bot.

“I have a higher tolerance for pickup lines,” Dave amended, trying to look less awkward than he was feeling. “They’re ironic enough”.

“Would it soothe your fears if I were to state that, for the record, the original Dirk is observing this through my optical lens, and if I ever step too far, or if you say to stop, I will be forced to comply?”

Dave thought about that; aside for the obvious voyeurism tendencies of the other Strider -which was actually something he had expected, considering who his own Bro had been, and to be honest, it sent a thrill of intrigue down his back- he realised he would have been fine even without that revelation.

In fact, the more BroBot spoke, the more Dave found himself relaxing; even if he was unable to read him, the brain inside the robot’s body was very much living and alive.

“It’s fine, bro,” Dave shrugged, staring at a spot right above the robot’s shoulder. “In truth, if I hadn’t wanted this I would have put up more of a fight”.

The robot tilted his head to the side. “I was under the impression you actually fought to the best of your abilities, which is kind of supported by how much you cursed when I pinned you the first time”.

Cheeks still red, Dave rolled his eyes. “That’s not what I meant. And I thought you were all for irony?”

The chuckle he received for his words was enough of an answer, and he cringed slightly, feeling like his coolness levels had just dropped to a new low.

“Let’s just do this, you stupid bot,” he grumbled. “You better make this worthwhile”.

This time, much to his shock, the metallic lips of the bot actually shifted into a smirk. “Dirk Strider, robotic or not, never leaves anyone unsatisfied”.

“Wait, you can actually have facial expr-mmph!”

Dave’s affronted rant was cut short by a pair of lips descending on his own, which effectively shut him up.

BroBot’s hands slid up his sides, holding him in place as he kissed him, and Dave fidgeted slightly, not liking the lack of control over the situation.

At the same time, he really didn’t mind it either.

The bot’s lips -they were actual lips, not just an opening on his face, and the amount of detail Dirk put on his creations was absurdly _creepy_ \- were cold and definitely not soft, but the contact sent a jolt down his back anyway, so Dave leaned more into the kiss, wondering just how messed up he was to be enjoying making out with a robot.

BroBot’s eyes whirred again, then much to Dave’s surprise, he felt a tongue part his lips, and let out a shocked gasp.

“My creator thought it would be interesting to build in as many details as he could,” the robot stated, voice coming out clear despite having his mouth occupied with Dave’s. The teen distantly wondered where the speakers were.

His second unspoken question -related to what exactly that ‘added detail’ could do- was quickly answered; the tongue, while metallic, was definitely flexible, and the way it curled around Dave's own was actually… nice.

The android’s hands were moving again, rubbing and pressing against his sides before sliding up his torso, mapping it inch by inch; not knowing where to put his arms, Dave wrapped them around the bot’s waist, feeling the smooth, cool expanse of metal under his fingers.

BroBot shifted slightly, closer than before but still not pressing their bodies together, and continued kissing him. The glowing eyes still whirred, and Dave wondered what Dirk was seeing from the other end -if he was getting a kick out of watching his robot molesting his Alternate Universe brother.

He probably was… and Dave had no trouble admitting the thought was doing _things_ to him, too.

The android finally broke the kiss, leaving Dave panting slightly, cheeks flushed red, and moved to his neck, tongue flicking over his skin, making him shiver; it was weird, but every spot the bot touched felt overly sensitive, and Dave squirmed, trying not to make a sound.

BroBot let out a displeased grunt, clearly not happy by the lack of verbal response, and moved to Dave’s ear, nibbling at it.

With a huff, Dave tried to edge away, but BroBot once again stopped him; it seemed the bot knew of his sensitive spots even if Dave himself didn’t, because when he started to lick the shell of his ear, a wave of intense heat washed over the teen, robbing him of his breath.

Dave’s effort to stay quiet wavered with every lewd, lazy stroke of that weird metallic tongue, and it took all his willpower not to moan out loud.

“Not fair, bro,” Dave hissed, taking his arms away from the robot's back to try and put some distance between them.

BroBot reacted instantly, one hand reaching up to stop him, fingers wrapping around both of his wrists and forcing them up above his head; Dave’s eyes widened behind his shades, feeling exposed all of sudden.

The android smirked and moved back to Dave's neck, nipping his way down, taking his time to lavish every inch of his skin with small nibbles and licks, pausing at a particular spot of his collarbone that made Dave finally gasp out, unable to restrain himself anymore.

“Hnnn-” Dave grunted, feeling his body respond already to the robot’s ministrations, and tried in vain to get free. “L-let me go”.

BroBot shook his head slightly, eyes glowing brighter for a moment. “You don’t really want to break free,” he stated obnoxiously. “You seem to like that -being completely at my mercy, unable to do anything…”

Dave shivered, eyes clouded by a strong wave of lust, and tried to come up with a smart comeback, but his brain just didn’t seem to want to collaborate.

BroBot smirked. “Just as I thought”.

He returned to his nibbling and licking, and Dave squirmed underneath him, embarrassed at the thought that each and every action was being reviewed by Dirk, now uncomfortable with the knowledge that he was watching him lose his cool.

With his free hand, BroBot started playing with Dave’s nipples, teasing them with light, feathery touches; Dave stiffened when he felt a small jolt pass from those fingers to his skin, shivering when BroBot pressed his index down, intensifying the sensation and making his breath itch.

“F-fuck, you're electrifying,” he gasped out, resenting the way his voice shook.

“Must be my magnetic appeal, babe,” was the reply.

Dave rolled his eyes behind his shades, but was too busy enjoying the sparkles of pleasure to come up with a dignified reply.

The waves were soft but constant, and BroBot’s hand circled his nipples, sending stronger sparkles every now and then without warning, extracting small gasps from Dave’s lips, who found the motions addictive.

Slowly, that hand moved down, tracing lines on Dave’s stomach, playing a bit around his bellybutton and then moving lower, a single finger tracing the growing bulge inside Dave’s pants before moving even lower, bypassing it completely.

Dave let out a frustrated growl, wriggling a bit, but he was still trapped by the robot's other hand, and could do nothing.

“Just let me… let me go,” Dave tried to reason with BroBot, but the android smirked again, parting his legs and settling between them.

“I think I enjoy seeing you helpless like that. I _know_ you like it,” he stated, the metallic tone edging into something else.

Dave shivered, not sure what to say about the bot’s complete certainty, and swallowed, trying not to think about how easily that robot could read him.

The android’s hand settled for a spot close to Dave’s groin, massaging the skin of his inner thigh from above his pants, but not moving an inch from there, teasing him, and Dave’s legs parted on their own accord as he let his head fall back against the ground, taking deep, shivery breaths.

Every time the hand moved closer, Dave’s heart would skip a beat then race ahead, only to be left disappointed when the hand retreated.

“You’re a fucking tease,” he growled out, eyes turning hazy when the hand moved even closer, the thumb ghosting so close to his now strained erection…

“Yes, I have to make it good,” and the hand moved away again.

Dave flushed in anger and shame, and when BroBot moved slightly away, still holding him down with one hand, he could not hide the disappointed whine at the lack of contact.

BroBot moved Dave until he was on his side, the teen’s stomach pressed against his right hip, then tugged at the hem of his pants to push them down to his thighs, freeing the teen’s cock.

Then, the robot promptly ignored it, his fingers instead moving to caress the curve of Dave’s ass, where the skin was more sensitive.

Dave exhaled loudly, eyes fluttering close, feelings those fingers moving lower, barely parting his cheeks…

Only to retreat, once again, and he whined louder, forcing his eyes open again to glare at the robot.

“S-stop playing,” the hand was moving again, massaging his thigh, deliciously distracting. “I want…”

BroBot shoved Dave’s pants off completely and out of the way, then lifted his leg higher; he held it up, nuzzling at skin of his inner knee, hand caressing the thigh up and down, closer and closer and away again, the movement making Dave’s cock twitch.

“This is e–everything but ironic, fuck–” wriggling a bit, Dave tried to get free once again. “Get it over with, or I will rework your circuits unti–” his voice failed him when BroBot’s hand moved to circle his balls.

The touch was foreign and weird, and it instantly shut him up, eyes rolling in the back of his head as fingers massaged and tugged, sliding past his balls to tease the base of his aching cock, barely offering enough pressure to satisfy his need.

“W–what… are y–you getting off on… torturing me…?” Dave let out a string of curses when the hand retreated from him, almost ready to break down and downright beg the robot to just move the fuck up.

“Exactly. You eloquently described the situation happening on this side. Also, it seems you didn’t quite catch the drift, as you keep using your mouth to babble instead of simply moaning”.

Dave blinked, and assessed the situation, though his hazy brain did have trouble focusing on anything that was not the pleasure he was being denied.

With a disgruntled moan, he relaxed in BroBot’s grip, trying not to pay attention to how hard he was.

“Fuck me like you mean it, bro,” he murmured. “I don’t think you want to go back to your word now”.

The smirk on the bot’s face turned positively evil. “I never break my promises, kiddo”.

The words had the desired effect, and Dave looked away, trembling at the waves of lust coiling in his stomach.

“Touch me,” he ordered, breathless.

With a metallic snort, BroBot leaned down, “Wasn’t I touching you until now?”

“Smarta– hmmpf,” BroBot muffled Dave’s retort, attaching himself to his lips once again, hand massaging around the teen’s erection, finally – _finally_ – gripping its base, pumping it.

Dave let out a strangled moan, muffled by BroBot’s lips, feeling the android’s body pressing flush against his own, cool metal under the naked skin of his thighs, one hand pumping him, the other circling his entrance, shifting until it was pressing _in_ –

Dave didn’t even realise BroBot had freed his arms, because what the robot was doing to him had robbed him completely of coherence.

He writhed and arched his back, one hand digging into the grass, the other scrambling to grab BroBot’s shoulder, nailing at the metal as cool, thin fingers parted his cheeks and nudged inside.

“Ah… f–fuck… oh, _shit_ –”

He didn’t know how that was possible, but the fingers were slick and oily –and god did he hope it wasn’t some sort of motor oil– and they slid in easily, rubbing at his inner walls, stretching him slowly but methodically.

The touch was not uncomfortable –the metal slid easier than real fingers would– but the hand gripping his cock, pumping him in rhythm with the stroking, was driving him crazy.

“Hnnn… _ah_ …”

He arched his back, moaning again, cheeks flushed and eyes wide open behind his shades, face buried in BroBot neck, breathing hard and watching the lucid metal turn opaque.

The fact that he could not even bite down on it was disappointing, and knowing this meant he could not stifle his moans was even more embarrassing.

He knew that Dirk, wherever he was hiding, was probably getting off on it and on his loss of control.

The thought only served to excite him more, and he groaned loudly, pushing himself down to meet the wandering fingers inside him.

“W–wait, _ahh_ …” Dave arched his back at a particularly deep push that brushed against something weird inside him, his breath itching in his throat. “How are you going to… _hnnn_ … f–fuck…”

Apparently BroBot had noticed his falter, and without waiting for him to collect his bearings had taken upon himself to work on that small spot, massaging it with his middle finger but without applying too much strength.

The soft, continuous stimulation changed quickly from weird to definitely pleasant, then into a deep friction that sent sparkles of pleasure down his frame.

Dave clutched at the robot’s shoulder, pushing him closer, panting and writhing.

“Don’t you dare… s–stop… ah, _fuck–_ ” BroBot pushed his leg higher, leaving him in an embarrassing, spread open position, and pulled his fingers out. “Man, you can’t dangle that sweet treat in front of my eyes and then take it away!”

BroBot tilted his head to the side, his optical lens whirring once more. “If you are still capable of speaking coherently, it seems like I will need to dish out a proper meal”.

With a grunt, Dave tried to turn around to face the android, but BroBot did not allow him to, pressing his body down against Dave’s, his leg awkwardly squeezed between their chests, and smirked.

His hand was still massaging Dave’s cock, teasing its slit.

“Ready or not, here I come at the count of three–”

“Wait, wait,” Dave gasped, nails scraping at the metallic shoulder. “What… are you even equipped for…”

“–two…”

“No, seriously, is Dirk so depraved that he added–” Dave paused for a moment. “Oh, who am I kidding, of course he–”

“–one…” leaning closer, the bot licked Dave’s lips, tongue teasingly running over his teeth.

“I said wai–”

“Let’s do this,” BroBot whispered in Dave’s ear. “Let’s make it _happen_ ”.

Dave shivered, and then–

BroBot started pushing in.

Dave’s brain panicked instantly as he felt something cool push inside, easily sliding inside him, slowly but without stopping.

A part of him wondered where BroBot had been hiding whatever he was pushing inside, because the bot didn’t wear clothes and had been up to that moment completely void of distinguishing male features, another part was busy moaning loudly, his tense muscles aching as he desperately clung to the android’s back.

“F–fuck,” he hissed out, feeling the length inside him curve and press unevenly at his walls, until it was completely sheathed inside. “W–what is… that…”

“I am well endowed,” BroBot murmured, nibbling at Dave’s collarbone again, smirking at the shiver the action caused. “Want to know what else I can do?”

“Yes, I’d say that since you’re taking a nice stroll inside my ass, that would mean that _yes_ , I wouldn’t mind getting my hands on your instructions manua–”

And once again BroBot interrupted him mid-sentence, this time with a soft click, followed by a buzzing sound, and Dave gasped.

Without warning, something inside him started vibrating and writhing slightly, pressing against nerves he’d never known he had inside him, stretching and massaging every inch of his inner walls, stimulating the same spot BroBot had been so intent in rubbing before.

Everything vanished into a wave of strong heat and pleasure, and Dave cried out, overwhelmed by the sudden sensation.

“ _Holyfuck ohshi–_ ” he arched his back, clinging at the robot’s body as he felt the remains of his coolness crash and disappear under the onslaught of pure pleasure.

The thing inside him writhed and curled –fucking _curled_ around, as if alive– and Dave opened his mouth and _wailed_

“Yes, yes, yes, fuck–”

BroBot kept a steely grip on him, smirking all the while, the bastard, but Dave had better things to think about –like the pleasure and the heat and how _good_ it felt.

BroBot slid inside him once more, pushing his leg further up, hooking it over his shoulder, and their lips met again, and Dave was thankful because he didn’t think the neighbours over in the next universe wanted to hear him screaming

He was barely aware of anything that was not BroBot fucking him senseless against the grass, of the thought that Dirk was looking through those lenses and was probably jerking off to the sight, of the monstrosity slamming inside him at a fast, even pace

Metal warming up against his skin, rubbing and massaging him, one hand around his cock, pumping it in time with the thrusting

“Ah, _fuck_ , yes–”

And that fucking _vibration_ , it was everywhere inside him, pushing him higher, making him clutch at BroBot’s body, cursing and crying out

Orgasm hit him so hard he bucked into BroBot’s hand, arching his back and riding it as the android twisted and pushed inside one last time, forcing himself even deeper.

Dave cried out loudly, shades slipping down his nose and falling onto the grass, leaving his face completely exposed to the greedy stare of the android, optical lens whirring madly to zoom in on his blissful expression.

For a moment, everything blurred out of focus and pleasure took over.

Red eyes fluttered open after what felt like forever, and Dave groaned, completely exhausted.

His body was humming with the aftereffects of his climax, shaking and trembling in a comfortable, fuzzy way, his skin horribly sensitive to where BroBot was still touching him.

He had to restrain a hiss when he realised BroBot was still inside him, uncomfortably stretching him.

Thankfully, the robot had turned the vibration off.

“ _Fuck_ ,” he gasped, unable to even lift a finger. “I… fuck”.

BroBot’s smug expression was far too proud, it irked Dave quite a lot.

“As I stated before, Dirk Strider never leaves anyone unsatisfied. And in the end, I did manage to make you shut up and take it like a man”.

Had Dave had more energy in his body, he would have slapped the bot for his stupid comment, but as it was, he didn’t, though he made a mental note to do it later, when the world stopped feeling so fucking good.

Slowly, BroBot removed himself from Dave, who didn’t even have time to catch a glimpse of what the bot had used to fuck him up so good before it was sealed once again inside the stupid android’s body.

“Not fair,” he muttered, trying in vain to sit up. “I think I’m entitled to see what you got down there, seeing we were intimately introduced just seconds ago”.

“Striders don’t kiss and tell, Dave,” the bot smirked, but his arms remained firmly set around the human’s torso. “That might be arranged for the next time”.

Dave licked his lips, completely still as he pondered over BroBot’s words.

“That… would be fair, yes,” he muttered, clearing his voice. “If _this_ dick keeps being part of it, and that other dick decides to grace us with his presence”.

BroBot’s optical lenses whirred for a second. “That can be a thing that might happen, yes,” he agreed.

Dave finally smirked. “Then my robotic friend, the deal’s sold”.


End file.
